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It's too damn hot…

It's too damn hot…

We don’t get to say this very often in the UK – although it’s starting to happen with alarming regularity – but it’s just too damn hot. Which means my hormones are going a tad bonkers, principally because:

– the fans are on. Which means any woman stepping into the office suddenly brings with her a gust of gorgeously moist cold air, and her hair billowing in the breeze like a Mariah Carey video

– she’s also usually wearing a tanktop and a skirt, like Beyonce Knowles.

Why is it though, when it is hot, women have a multitude of options for wearing clothing that leave just enough to the imagination, but also manage to keep them cool, collected and sweat-free? Men, on the other hand, have one of two options:

– T-shirt and shorts. Except the T-shirt will stick to your back, and the shorts will expose your knobbly knees, pale white skin and hairless legs

– Tanktop and shorts. Except you look like a redneck wifebeater. Or even worse.

– Just shorts. Which has all the problems with shorts, and the added problem of showing off your hairy armpits, flabby chest and will also probably get you booted out of the office.

The cycle home will mostly be spent trying not to ogle women joggers on the riverbank lest I cycle into the river – although that would at least refresh my sweat-soaked skin – before I go to every supermarket in Cardiff in a futile attempt to find some ice cream.

And to think I’m going to Egypt in just over two weeks. Where it’s twice as hot. Literally.

6 Comments

  • Funny how you found a photo on Flickr called "Blow" isn't it?

    Personally, I find it too hot to fuck. I'm sweating enough as it is! Not that I'd turn anyone down. I'd just make them do all the work.

  • I'll just have to take your word for it. I can't read degrees Celsius…

    Last night, I biked through some sprinklers on purpose!

    That redneck isn't nearly half as scary as the ones I grew up with…I suspect he's British. Maybe just a village idiot.

  • It's WAY too hot here too in Canuck ville. Like 40 degrees C.

  • You brains must be addled by the heat, because you've just slandered some poor innocent bloke by linking to him with the anchor text of "Redneck Wifebeater".

    LOL

  • V. jealous I have always wanted to go to Egypt.

  • Pisser – I cycled to work and back yesterday and there was a wonderful thunderstorm and lashing rain… within seconds of me getting home. GAH!

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