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"Are there no gay Chinese men in Cardiff?"

"Are there no gay Chinese men in Cardiff?"

So said the local snack shop vendor to me, as we chatted about his Chinese wife, who he said he “met” via that ultra-suspicious side, He said that, and I went into a slightly ill-advised rant about how it was men like him who meant people like me couldn’t get a date… which led to him asking why I hadn’t found a gay Chinese man in Cardiff. Cue slightly uncomfortable silence.

To be fair, mr. Snack Shop has never particularly struck me as the intelligent intellectual cosmopolitian person in Cardiff. He’s referred to beating people up for the hell of it in the past, and talks of his ex-wife in the most murderous ways possible. Plus he wears a medallion, and refers darkly to his days in the Army. Probably yer typical Cardiff’ian.

His relationship with his second wife seems a tad odd too. She’s from China, he went over there to marry her and bring her back here. Apparently she hates the pub and socialising, and likes nothing better than looking after their kid. And going to the odd garden centre. Not exactly my idea of the perfect relationship – but it’s probably his.

Oddly, I’ve had people assume I was gay before and not been remotely bothered by it. Probably because they seemed cool, socialable and weren’t potential unreconstructed thugs with hairy chests who sell me Coke and biscuits. Either that or Cardiff’s changed me.

Still it woke me up from a sleepy Thursday afternoon at work where I have a pile of dull work to do.


  • A comment along the lines of 'I'm the only Chinese gay in the village' seems inevitable.

  • You should give him a break. I have zero gay Chinese on Facebook, and I've only seen a handful of gay Chinese in London. Most gays are usually white or Indian here.

    The biggest surprise to me is that I've never seen a gay black in London! I sometimes think that they are less likely to be gay or commit suicide or something. I don't mind as I don't find them attractive but it's interesting.

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